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Currents of Consciousness

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You won’t ever be content” insults one of the undesirable voices reverberating in my mind.

What does that try and mean? My temple kinks in thought and recognition.

I’ve been known as a great deal of things all through my fifty or more years – extraordinary, bossy, free, yet entirely never happy. Entertaining – I concur – I’m a ton of those. I really find them engaging, despite the fact that they’re generally thrown at me adversely. Am I discontent? I think not. I was likewise called mysterious once. I confirmed that reasonable. However, taking into account who it came from, I’m certain it was implied from a disparaging perspective. I thought that it is edifying. It caused me to feel content.

I recollect one time for a work occasion, we were approached to contrast ourselves with a sea, a lake or a stream. I concluded I was a waterway. After communicating this to my associates, who predominantly pronounced themselves lakes, they shook their heads in compassion, I surmise, and one lady said, “Relax, you’ll arrive.”

My eyebrows brought up in astounded disarray. Questions filled my head. Get where? To your lake? To my lake? Why? What’s up with being a waterway? For what reason would it be a good idea for me to endeavor to be lake? Like it were a generally looked for accomplishment in life to simply kick back and never want to continue to move forward. A satisfactory spot to quit learning, or to quit endeavoring to be better. Is there ever a point in life where you arrive at a limit and simply ponder internally, “OK, I’m finished – I’ve arrived at the point in my life where everything is great, I’m great. Time to stop.” Maybe it is the target for which I ought to point. Perhaps I’m simply abnormal, however I can’t envision that perspective. It feels so restricting. For what reason do they expect that endeavoring to get a lake way of life makes everybody content?

How could I at any point hope to be that stale? Is that being content? Provided that this is true, no way. Perhaps I’ll arrive at that level when I’m on my demise bed, up to that point, there is a lot to do and see and appreciate and learn. I lack the opportunity to be a lake. I would need to prefer not to be a lake and with that, I’m content. One meaning of content is to be “in a condition of quiet joy” another is “fulfilled.” All things considered, I would feel caught inside the limits of a stale lake, I would not feel fulfilled. For my purposes, fulfillment and being in a condition of tranquil joy implies everlastingly following a mission for a superior me. I can’t do that standing by, my feet trapped in the mud. Feeling stuck doesn’t cause me to feel content.

Like a waterway, I pick my own way to follow toward a chose objective. Imagining the potential outcomes causes me to feel content in motivation. The suspicious eyewitnesses can pick a beautiful rock abandoned in the stream bed to recollect me by, in the wake of seeing my quick current roll past the green bank. Still up in the air, driven; yes. Unusual: no! My objective is obvious. Perhaps I’ll meet you there. I’m content in my stream.

Many individuals appear to be awkward with my constant stream; some of the time fast and violent; frequently, entrancing and welcoming, yet consistently restored. You might need to drink from my stream, yet, except if you dare cross the likely rapids, you can’t. Anybody is free to go along with me; I value the organization, yet generally, it stays a desolate excursion. I wouldn’t fret. I’m content in the reality of isolation.

For my subsequent option, I would view myself as a sea. Figuring out how to ride on top of the water doesn’t engage me, I might want to SCUBA plunge. I really want treasure tracked down inside the water’s dim profundities, and steady variety of the base and sea life. offering information to reveal. I would be so involved, I could forget where to surface. Getting that lost terrifies me. However, i partake in the distress of overcoming my apprehensions. I will imagine I’m a mermaid, when I get swallowed by the sea. There, I could be content.

Not that I can’t require some investment to partake in the magnificence of a lake: the reflection, the serenity. It’s a brilliant spot to pause and rest. It’s where I can revive my solidarity to settle on my next course, not a spot for me to wait for all time. It’s an extraordinary spot for a cooling dunk in the late spring, or ice skating in the colder time of year, however I would have no desire to live there. At the point when I feel revived, now is the right time to move. I’m content in my opportunity of decision.

It’s right now around seventeen years after the fact. I’m actually cutting my own way and pushing ahead. At times it’s rough, yet frequently I love the sound, and the mysterious sight of shining water. Is a waterway discontent? There was a period where I was discontent, feeling kept down by a man-made dam.

At the point when I think back, I can see that I attempted to carry on with sensibly quieted inside a way of life that, basically, anticipated that I should be a lake. I accepted I was unequipped for doing anything all alone. I feared the chance of my own power. At the point when I was youthful, I attempted to turn out to be totally drenched in the lake when I fizzled at making cheeseburgers, making my statement. It was smothering. At the point when I progressed in years, a stumble with spaghetti made me flood. I over spilled my banks and made my own course, resisting the dams that kept, still keep, attempting to keep me down. I’m content toward me of stream.

Eventually, a waterway typically spills into a sea. Perhaps, when I arrive at that point in my designated wandering, I can jump, fulfilled, into it’s profundities. Up to that point, I like being a waterway and I happily take a stab at nothing unique in relation to that. I needn’t bother with your lake.

SUPRIYO BORLast Seen: Jul 22, 2023 @ 2:38pm 14JulUTC

SUPRIYO BOR

@SupriyoBor





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