3 Things That Silently Drained Me And Why My Energy Crashed Ember Rage

3 Things That Silently Drained Me and Why My Energy Crashed | Ember Rage

    Ember Rage
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    3 THINGS THAT SILENTLY DRAINED ME AND WHY MY ENERGY CRASHED

    For the past three days, I've felt completely drained—zero energy, even though I've been eating healthy, exercising, and watching motivational videos. Nothing seems to work. It's like my body just shut down, and I couldn't figure out why.

    So, as my usual routine, I made myself some green tea, went up to the rooftop, and started thinking deeply about what could be causing this sudden drop in energy. After reflecting on my actions, my emotions, and my daily routine, I came to a realization—there were three major things that triggered this state.

    1. PUSHING MYSELF INTO SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FEEL RIGHT Six days ago, I decided to document my"365- Day Fils Challenge Journey with Al Salam Bank". I thought this could be an interesting experience, but after just six days, I completely stopped. It didn't feel right to me. It was a small change, but it went against what I really enjoyed. This experience reminded me that if I want to challenge myself, it has to be in a way that still feels true to who I am.

    THINGS I'VE LEARNED I am not obligated to do something that doesn't match who I truly am. Sometimes, I attempt to explore new things, thinking they might be good for me. But I've realized that forcing myself into activities that don't feel natural only drains my energy.

    2. BREAKING MY PERSONAL ROUTINE I have a daily routine that I follow because I know when I'm most productive. But for the past three days, my husband has been extra affectionate, wanting to talk and spend more time together. Of course, I give him attention, but I have limits.

    I don't like clinginess, and I need my personal space to focus on things I love. There's a specific time of the day when I'm at my peak productivity, and I value that. But lately, I've been adjusting to him, even when I don't feel like it.

    One thing that drains me the most is when he insists that I sit beside him while he watches the news. I don't like watching news about war, suffering, and negativity because it deeply affects my energy. I've told him this, but it's just part of who he is—he wants me beside him even when I'm uninterested. This is exhausting for me because it contradicts my personality.

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    THINGS I'VE LEARNED Again, I failed to be mindful and protect my personal boundaries. I allowed my husband to interfere with my personal routine, which affected my mind, mood, and energy.

    This experience reminded me of the importance of setting clear boundaries to protect my personal space. I love my husband, but the reality is we don't always get along, and I have accepted this. I will continue to give him my time and fulfill my responsibilities as his wife, but when it comes to my personal routine, I need to stand my ground. Whether he accepts it or not, this is who I am. I allow him to be himself, and he must respect me for this.

    Every time he asks me to sit beside him and watch the news, I could actually stay beside him while doing my own thing—writing content, researching, or watching motivational videos. But that never happens, because the moment I sit beside him, he starts talking endlessly, reacting to every negative news about war, killings, and destruction.

    I've told him before to watch something inspiring, but he refuses. This drains my energy because I can't focus on what I want to do. Another thing that bothers me is when he calls me, he expects me to come right away, like I'm some kind of robot. But I don't like being rushed. I need to move at my own speed—so I make it clear to him that he has to wait. I refuse to be forced to do things instantly just because he wants something at that moment.

    3. LONG CONVERSATIONS THAT LEAD NOWHERE I'm not comfortable with long conversations—especially when they don't make sense or lead to unnecessary conflict. My husband is a good person, but our conversations often last only about five minutes before I start feeling irritated.

    For example, he'll ask me about cultural differences, and when I explain that every culture is different, he'll respond with a judgmental comment. He asks for my thoughts, but when I share them, he doesn't accept them. Instead, he makes negative remarks, which I find frustrating.

    He believes that only his country, food, and culture are the best, which leads me to lose interest. I take care of him and even cook food from his country, but I never offer him or share any food from the Philippines. I never let him try it. I make sure to prepare his meals, but when it comes to mine, I eat alone, and I enjoy it more that way, without any interruptions. I appreciate my food more when I'm by myself.

    I love my husband, but I also accept that this part of his personality is why I prefer spending more time alone than being with him.

    THINGS I'VE LEARNED This has no permanent solution because we live together, but I've thought of one thing that might help. I will try sending him messages via WhatsApp, explaining why I don't enjoy long conversations that drain me. WhatsApp has an Arabic translation feature, which will make it easier for him to understand my point.

    Even though we are always together at home, when there are times we don't talk, this is how we communicate—I send him messages through WhatsApp. He understands English, but he understands things better when they are translated into Arabic. This way, I can clearly express what I feel, and he can take time to understand it instead of us going back and forth in discussions that leave me feeling tired.

    I will also set the intention to allow meaningful conversations—ones that uplift my spirit and make me feel connected. But when the talk starts to feel negative or judgmental, I will step away. If this solution doesn't work, then I will stick to keeping conversations short. Five minutes is enough if the discussion leads nowhere.

    FINAL THOUGHTS

    Now that I've written all this down, I feel a little lighter. Expressing my thoughts honestly makes me realize the real reason why I feel drained.

    It's not about food, exercise, or motivation. It's about forcing myself into things that don't feel right—whether it's committing to something that contradicts who I am, breaking my personal routine, or engaging in conversations that drain my energy.

    Things That Silently Drained Me And Why My Energy Crashed Quotes Milyin

    Sometimes, we think we're tired because of external factors, but deep down, it's our inner resistance—the feeling of going against our true selves—that exhausts us the most.

    From now on, I'll be more mindful. I'll honor my own rhythm, protect my energy, and stay true to what feels right for me.

    DISCLAIMER: I know these are personal matters, but my intention in sharing this isn't to blame my husband or make him look bad.

    This is simply my reality. This is what truly happens, and I believe that by putting everything into words, I get to understand myself better. The more I break things down, the more I recognize what works for me and what doesn't.

    I am not biased in my reflections—I don't just talk about my husband's actions; I also admit my own flaws, my mistakes, and the things I need to improve on. I don't filter my personality or pretend to be someone I'm not. I choose to be honest because I believe that self-awareness starts with acceptance—acceptance of both my strengths and my weaknesses.

    At the end of the day, this isn't about who is right or wrong. It's about clarity—understanding why I feel the way I do and making conscious choices that align with my well-being. I love my husband, and I respect him, but I also respect myself. And for me, respecting myself means recognizing when something drains me and taking steps to protect my energy.

    By reflecting on this, I remind myself to stay mindful, to set boundaries, and to be true to what gives me peace. Honesty—especially with myself—is the key to staying balanced and strong.

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