#firstlove#romance#
A HEART’S UNSPOKEN SYMPHONY
First love can never be forgotten. It is an indelible part of our lives, a tale we cherish and reminisce about with nostalgia. While some are fortunate enough to boast successful love stories, others are left mystified or indifferent if things don’t unfold in their favor.
Sameera’s first love is the tale of a spirited teenager with dreams of marriage founded on unconditional love, free from constraints. Impulsive as a child, with an impulsive desire to claim whatever caught her eye, she fell head over heels in love with Ravi at first sight.
Ravi with a charming face framed by side locks, possessed a pale white complexion and dark hair that seemed like a freshly harvested field. His boyish allure, accentuated by wide fingers flitting through his hair, captivated girls in the college, including Sam.
From the moment Same laid eyes on him, she was enchanted. Ravi, with his sharp shooting eyes and a demeanor of a teen heart-breaker, had her heart captured. During their first encounter, he wore a spotless white shirt paired with perfectly shaped blue jeans, causing Sam’s head to turn involuntarily in his direction. Oblivious to the stares of her classmates, her head spun like the slowly rotating blades of a helicopter, fixated on a boy who had captured her imagination. Her heart skipped a beat when he glanced in her direction while searching for a seat on his first day of college.
Despite her desire to invite him to sit beside her, Sam's shyness became a barrier. Adrenaline surged through her, and her lips trembled as she tried to calm herself, fearing she might not resist the temptation to steal a kiss. Classes continued, but Sam was too engrossed in romantic fantasies to pay attention. She secretly envied the girls who had the courage to talk to him, wondering if he, too, was shy and reserved.
Each night, she rehearsed her introduction lines, yet failed to deliver them when he approached her. One day, decked up in traditional wear, she caught his attention. The exchanged glances between them resembled love-struck doves, fluttering and kissing in an isolated spot, untouched by prying eyes. Sparks exploded in their hearts, leaving their blushes distinctly visible.
Days elapsed, yet she found herself unable to summon the courage to initiate a conversation with him. The stolen glances hinted at a mutual attraction, leaving the unspoken connection hanging in the air. Both hesitated to take the first step. Frustration brewed as she blamed her own shyness for hindering potential progress. However, a nagging question emerged: Why didn't he make a move? Was it ego that restrained him from approaching her? Observing him effortlessly engage in light banter with other girls left her slightly disconcerted. She too was no ordinary looking girl. She possessed an allure, that could captivate even the most stoic men. Like a mage with a magic capable of bending hearts to her whim, she exuded a charm that was hard to resist. Many boys in her college vied for her attention, engaging in a competitive pursuit to win her favor and secure the opportunity to date her. Yet, despite these qualities, she found herself unable elicit conversation from him.
Despite the apparent admiration from other girls, he subtly expressed a sense of repulsion when their advances became brazen. She longed to unravel the mysteries of his mind, to explore every facet of his being. Yet, her own bashfulness proved to be the spoiler, further complicating the unspoken dance between them.
At times she caught snippets of her classmates discussing him. Their chitchat revealed that he was not only suave but also genuinely helpful. Yet, such tidbits weren’t sufficient for her. She felt an irresistible need to delve into every aspect of his persona; falling for him without knowing more seemed utterly witless. She blamed her all-girls schooling for her struggle to adapt to interacting with boys which deprived her the opportunity to get to know them. She repeatedly found herself overwhelmed and panicked in their presence. The limitation confined her to friendships exclusively within her own gender.
Thus four years drifted by in contemplation. The day of her graduation finally arrived, and to her surprise he chose to sit next to her, a seat that she reserved for her friend, during convocation, forsaking his usual company of friends. Despite their lips remaining pursed, a plethora of unvoiced emotions hung palpably in the air between them. Seated side by side they shared a quiet that that endured between them for all four years, until the announcement of his name for the certificate was pronounced.
He rose from his seat, turned to her and uttered
“Good luck for your future Sameera!”
With that he departed. She fixed her gaze on him until he made his way to the podium. As he received the certificate, he cast a glance in her direction and offered a smile. A sharp pang struck her as the realization dawned that days of discreetly stealing glances at him had come to an end.
The two birds never had the chance to steal glances again.
As abruptly as an alarm sounding, Sameera was jolted awake from her dreamlike state by the doorbell. She opened it and received her husband returning from his office.
Husband: "Took you a while to answer the door, didn't it?" he said with a hint of irritation
Sameera: "Oh, sorry, I was tidying up in the other room. Must have missed the bell." She answered apologetically
Husband: "Well, try not to get too lost in cleaning next time."
Sameera: "I'll do that. How was your day?" she asked, smiling
When she opened the door for her husband, a deep desire brewed within her, an expectation she had always harbored and anticipated from him. A yearning for his arms to envelop her in a warm embrace and ignite the passion she deeply longed for. However, he remained reticent in expressing love through gestures, a facet she fervently craved.
In the quietude of that night she mused again over the possibility of an alternate reality and the untapped possibilities, imagining a different path where she and Ravi might have spoken, taken the chance, and explored the potential of a love left uncharted.
She found herself navigating the complexities of her arranged marriage, yearning for a passion that seems absent. The reminisces of the unspoken love of her youth made her rue the silence that kept her apart from Ravi. Grappling with a sense of discontent in the marriage devoid of fervor and haunted by the specter of an unexplored passion, her heart carried a heavy load of an unfulfilled longing.
Now at 36, immersed in familial responsibilities, Sam became an ordinary woman whose dreams remained unrealized, untenable, and her first love unforgettable.
BY REVATHY
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