Rebt

Achieving Mental Wellness: The 6 Steps of REBT for Healing and Transformation

earth Angel
@Harshita-Kalotra

12th December 2023 | 7 Views
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REBT stands for Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy. In 1955, the term RET was invented by Dr. Albert Ellis and subsequently changed into REBT when its behavioral component was added. This is an action-oriented powerful technique that enables you to think differently and change your life.

 We’re just what we’re thinking. Therefore, we can adapt our emotions and respond gracefully by changing our minds. REBT seeks to change undesirable thought patterns and illogical negative beliefs, which are replaced by healthy ones leading to new good attitudes and behavior.

 It’s inspired by the ABC model: A represents Activating Event. B represents Beliefs about A (rational and irrational). C stands for the consequences of belief in irrational beliefs emotional or behavioral.

REBT allows disputing the irrational belief by checking whether the belief is based on reality, logical, and useful, applying new effective philosophy, and eventually functioning with new good feelings, behavior, and physiological responses.

 To better comprehend the concept of the ABC model, we would like to give an example:

A (Activating Event) – It was one of your working days at college; you asked about a form submission to a clerk and he responded by shouting or yelling at you.

B (Irrational Belief) – I wish he had treated me with kindness, understanding, and patience. He’s a horrible person.

C (Undesirable emotional consequence) – Anger/rage and resentment.

D (Disputing or questioning the irrational belief)

1.  What’s the evidence simply just because I prefer him to be kind and understanding he absolutely should be kind and understanding towards me?

2. How does his misbehavior make him a horrible person or inhuman?

3. How is my anger going to help me?

E (Effective new philosophy)

1. Just because I prefer him to act with kindness and understanding only proves it’s what I value and what I prefer. It’s not written anywhere that he should or must act according to my preference.

2. I don’t control his actions, words, and behavior. He was just being himself. Let him be. It was nothing to do with me. Nothing wrong with me and I am not the one to blame. It was his choice.

3. Maybe he had a burnout of answering too many queries of form submission and just busted his frustration on me. His misbehavior only shows that he’s an imperfect human who acts imperfectly which doesn’t make him inhuman.

4. Since he’s an imperfect human who has feelings and emotions and is a free agent to act according to what he prefers at that moment. Blaming him for his rude behavior is irrational and not going to help me instead eats me from inside.

5. I can expect him to act imperfectly but if he misbehaves again; I’ll tell him very clearly that I don’t allow this kind of behavior because I don’t cause it.

6. I choose not to be angry myself, eating myself up inside with anger doesn’t help and only makes me worse.

7. I choose not to disturb myself because of his behavior and can stand this rude behavior even though I dislike it.

 

REBT is not something that you can conquer overnight. It will take time, effort, and personal commitment to change.

In life, whatever happened with you; it could be an event or it could be a person who misbehaved or mistreated. But in reality, it’s not about the event or the person that misbehaved or mistreated and the result you keep blaming yourself often.

Understand, things are happening as they should be so it was not your fault about what had happened. You’re not the one to blame. You’re not the one to be ashamed. It was their choice.

Practice it daily and do it over again and again to live a more satisfied, joyous, and meaningful life. Learn to unconditionally accept yourself, others, and life so that you can stop disturbing yourself emotionally.

 

 



earth Angel

@Harshita-Kalotra

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